Care during Stillbirth

[during the program]

“During the first IUFD I delivered, we didn't know that this what it was. A disturbed woman came in with contractions, she was admitted, and they [the staff] heard something in the monitor and examined her and found a full cervical dilatation. They moved her into a delivery room and a doctor and I came to take care for her. The doc asked to deliver this baby himself. Meanwhile, we hooked in the monitor and heard a pulse, and she was pushing. The baby came out and I couldn't realize what I was looking at. The baby's skin was peeling. Apparently, the baby was dead for a few days. The pulse we heard was the mom's and not the baby's. We were all shocked! The mother didn't understand what was going on. Breaking her these news… it was unexpected for all of us, none saw it coming because we heard a pulse. I didn't know what to do. This was so traumatic. Since then I never agreed to accept any more stillbirths.”

[after the program]

“The 'Loss Seminar' was one of the main reasons why I joined the program. I never agreed to accept stillbirths since that traumatic IUFD. It was really sad… as midwifes we don't have any tools, I didn't have the tools. Now, I think that it is maybe better if I'll be the one to take care of these women. I don't need to say much or do much. Especially acknowledging how sad it is without trying to comfort with all kinds of clichés or to suppress the pain. I just need to be there, and ask "What do you need at this moment?" or "Is there something I can help you right now?"